Renovation in Processes

Jesus said to the 72 He sent out, "However, do not rejoice that the spirits submit to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven."  I love how Eugene Peterson puts it in the Message, "All the same, the great triumph is not in your authority over evil, but in God's authority over you and presence with you. Not what you do for God but what God does for you - that's the agenda for great rejoicing." 

Luke 10:20 

This is a profound shift in perspective! We so want it to be about Jesus handing over his authority to us, and not about His authority over us.  We want to be in charge.  It is so tempting to have our Christian view be about us, and not about Him.  This is the way Christianity often rolls and when it does, it isn't pretty. It is only in turning our hearts over to Him, we can begin to live the life He wants for us. That is key....our lives lived for Him, according to His purposes and pleasure.  It is not for us to gain our little kingdom on earth; it is about Him at work in and through us, bringing His Kingdom to earth. And it is our very own dark hearts He begins with. Only out of this can we begin to be part of His plan to share the very good news of His Kingdom on earth.  Sometimes I feel like I only get glimpses of this.  

Dallas Willard has a book called Renovation of the Heart.  And that is really what our lives are about once we are born again.  The Holy Spirit has the daunting task of renovating our hearts so He can pour His life in and through us so we can be like more and more like Jesus in this lost and dying world. Our hearts are like an old house, boarded up and dilapidated.  Only we don't see it.  We see our hearts as beautiful and inviting.  That is the blindness Jesus is talking about when He goes on in this passage of scripture, "Blessed are the eyes that see what you see. For I tell you that many prophets and kings wanted to see what you see but did not see it...."  We are born blind to our own truth.

I need to let the Lord pry off the boards that cover the windows and doors of my soul.  I need to let Him clean out all the corners and recesses of the many rooms of my heart.  I need to quit trying to do it alone.  Only He can come in and find what really needs to be done.  He is the Master Builder.  I don't even have the blueprint.  Why do I think I know how to live without His Presence guiding me moment by moment?  Come Lord, and renovate my heart.  Make it worthy of Your Presence. Your Life in me.  It is amazing that You even want take up residence within me.  Help me allow You to clean me up so that Your Love can shine out from every opening there is. Forgive me for trying to protect the darkness, the dirt. Thank You for Your patience with me.  Help me let Your Light, Your love, shine from my heart, Your dwelling place.

Thoughts on Obedience

Obey.  That word keeps cropping up in my alone time with the Lord. It is not a word that I like.  I didn't even want to write about it. Something in me rises up and feels so rebellious towards it.  

This is actually, the war within me.  The war between my flesh (my personal desires) and the Spirit.  It is a daily battle.  My selfishness, my natural inclination to please my self, is always there waiting to crop up and pounce on any opportunity.  The opportunities abound don't they? And the reality is my selfishness usually leads to things that are harmful to myself and others!  Seriously!

It takes such attention, intentionality and care to stop and listen and follow the Other Voice within.  The Voice of the One Who knows me best, Who knows what is best for me, my Creator, the Lover of my soul.  The One Who sent His Son to live and die for me.  That Voice.  I need to constantly tune my ear to Him.  But I don't. Therein lies the work.

The wonder of Him living in me, giving me the option to override myself.  What an amazing gift.  God knew that no set of rules and regulations could do it.  We can not self manage.  Only He in me can do it.  He made a way. He is at work in us, as believers!

Philippians 2:12-13 Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.

Jesus said in John 14:15, and a bunch of other places, "If you love Me, you will obey what I command."  The outflow of our love is to obey Jesus.  How do we know what He commands?  We need to hang out with Him, in His Word and in prayer. We need to listen to Him. It's personal, relational!

As I choose to listen and follow His ways, something changes in me.  It is little by little but somehow I live beyond my circumstances. It becomes all about Him and me.  I think that is what Jesus meant when He said,  “I have loved you even as the Father has loved me. Remain in my love. When you obey my commandments, you remain in my love, just as I obey my Father’s commandments and remain in his love. I have told you these things so that you will be filled with my joy. (from John 15)

I am so not there yet. It does not come easily.  I get so disappointed with myself.  But God seems to just keep working with me and in me.  No condemnation. Just correction and encouragement to keep on trying.  So patient, so faithful and so loving.  I think we should see the word obedience as a gift.  A pathway to being at home, our true home, with the Lord.

Treasure

I am dwelling in Proverbs 4.  It tells me that I must guard my heart, watch over it.  My heart is the wellspring of my life. It is the center of who I am; what I do, springs from there.  My heart is where I need to keep the Word of God central.  My heart, when filled with the Lord, is a treasure trove.  It is where His life can overflow from me.  IF I allow that.  I can't keep my heart to myself, picking and choosing my own way and expect to walk closely with Him.  I must come to Him, drink deeply from His Word, and allow His Spirit to teach me and guide me.  From the inside out is the way to live.  It sounds so simple, but of course it isn't.

Proverbs 4:20-27 (nlt)  My child, pay attention to what I say. Listen carefully to my words. Don’t lose sight of them. Let them penetrate deep into your heart, for they bring life to those who find them,and healing to their whole body. Guard your heart above all else,  for it determines the course of your life. Avoid all perverse talk; stay away from corrupt speech. Look straight ahead, and fix your eyes on what lies before you. Mark out a straight path for your feet; stay on the safe path. Don’t get sidetracked; keep your feet from following evil.

It is easy to see here that the heart is what determines how we live.  It is out of our hearts that our words spring forth, our eyes seek what they will, and our feet lead us.  It is in our hearts that the Holy Spirit dwells.  It is our choice to seek God's Word and let it penetrate our lives. It is our choice whether or not we listen to His Spirit. It is our choice to let Him direct us as we go about our day.  Do I trust Him with my days?

He is the Treasure in this jar of clay for sure.  The One true God, who made the universe, within my heart.  Unfathomable! How can He be there? It is humbling. My heart clamors for  things that are so contrary to Him and His ways.  How my own short sightedness and selfishness steer me wrong, how they darken my heart and ignore His Voice.  This is why I so need to spend time in His Word, listening for Him, His truth.  I need to be reprogramed so His way of living overrides my strong bent towards looking out for number one, for worry, for the myriad of ways I follow the way of self-indulgence.  How merciful is God in the first place that He would even come and be with me?  Another unfathomable. He is the shining treasure of light and life in the dark recesses of my mind.  He sees things that I am only dimly aware of, things that He desires to cleanse me of.  He dwells in me with such patience and such love.  All grace. All undeserved.  Come Lord, come. Help me to guard my heart and allow you penetrate my heart, deeply. Thank you my Treasure, my Lord.

Growing Up

"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden.  Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl.  Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven."   Matthew 5:12-16

I always noticed the city on the hill part. Of course.  That is so grand...and impersonal.  This time I noticed that the light was on a stand to give light to 'everyone in the house'.  To the ones we live with, the ones we love.  This light, for the ones who see us the closest, the ones we show ourselves most truly to. So this is where the rubber hits the road.  How bright is that light, His light in me, at home?  This can be so convicting. It is at home where often it is the littlest thing that brings conflict. Home is where we let down and feel safe and therefore our selfishness surfaces most easily.  Home is the place where God can use everyday conflict to rub off the rough edges of our character.  It is where we can figure out how to keep the light shining when darkness wants to creep in.  It is where love can triumph.

At the end of chapter 5 of Matthew the Message says, "In a word, what I'm saying is grow up. You're kingdom subjects. Now live like it. Live out your God-created identity. Live generously and graciously toward others, the way God lives toward you."  So there's a thought!  Grow up! And how did God live towards us?  The incarnate Son of God, Jesus, came and lived among us. And He died.  He laid down His life, completely, for us so that we could continue to live with and in Him.  That is the way God lives toward me.  Sacrificial love.  Full of grace and mercy, He died for me and I didn't deserve it, at all.

Does my family see my light shine through good deeds? Am I living graciously and generously?  The message also says in this chapter, "live with the energies of prayer".  So there is the secret.  Let prayer be the fuel, communion with Him.  Live a life of abiding.  He is the home that I can live out of, in my earthly home and in my community as I pray, and as I seek Him, everyday, for what I need to grow up. To grow up the way He intends me to.

Thank you Lord for your patience.  Thank you that you desire to be the light that shines in every home.  Thank you that your light is the light of life.  Help me to live out your love, in my home and beyond.  Thank you for your grace and generosity towards me.  Forgive me for not extending that on to others. It seems I fall so short!  Help me to listen for your voice, which encourages me on my journey with You. Help me to follow, even when it feels difficult.